Quotulatiousness

February 7, 2021

Pearl Harbor Avenged! – WW2 – 128 – February 6, 1942

Filed under: Africa, Asia, Britain, Europe, Germany, History, Japan, Military, Pacific, Russia, USA, WW2 — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

World War Two
Published 6 Feb 2021

The Japanese advance in Burma and the Dutch East Indies, but they’ve reached the end of the Malayan Campaign- Singapore, which they have under siege. They now prepare for the final assault. The Allies are going on the offensive at sea, though, in the Marshalls-Gilberts Raids, while on land in the Soviet Union the Red Army launches another series of offensives against the Germans.

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Follow WW2 day by day on Instagram @ww2_day_by_day – https://www.instagram.com/ww2_day_by_day
Between 2 Wars: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list…
Source list: http://bit.ly/WW2sources

Written and Hosted by: Indy Neidell
Director: Astrid Deinhard
Producers: Astrid Deinhard and Spartacus Olsson
Executive Producers: Astrid Deinhard, Indy Neidell, Spartacus Olsson, Bodo Rittenauer
Creative Producer: Maria Kyhle
Post-Production Director: Wieke Kapteijns
Research by: Indy Neidell
Edited by: Iryna Dulka
Sound design: Marek Kamiński
Map animations: Eastory (https://www.youtube.com/c/eastory​)

Colorizations by:
– Mikołaj Uchman
– Julius Jääskeläinen – https://www.facebook.com/JJcolorization/​
– Dememorabilia – https://www.instagram.com/dememorabilia/​
– Norman Stewart – https://oldtimesincolor.blogspot.com/​

Sources:
– National Portrait Gallery
– Ministerie van Defensie
– Arrow by 4B Icons from the Noun Project
– Yad Vashem: 76BO2, 4331_21

Soundtracks from the Epidemic Sound:
– Rannar Sillard – “Easy Target”
– Jo Wandrini – “Dragon King”
– Fabien Tell – “Last Point of Safe Return”
– Howard Harper-Barnes – “Sailing for Gold”
– Craft Case – “Secret Cargo”
– Rannar Sillard – “Split Decision”
– Flouw – “A Far Cry”
– Johannes Bornlöf – “The Inspector 4”
– Johan Hynynen – “Dark Beginning”
– Edward Karl Hanson – “Spellbound”
– Howard Harper-Barnes- “Underlying Truth”

Archive by Screenocean/Reuters https://www.screenocean.com​.

A TimeGhost chronological documentary produced by OnLion Entertainment GmbH.

Roman legion vs Macedonian phalanx

Filed under: Europe, Greece, History, Military — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Epimetheus
Published 13 Aug 2018

Roman legion vs Macedonian phalanx (Macedonian wars)
Battle of Pydna 168 BC and battle of Cynoscephalae 197 BC

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February 6, 2021

From an improbable 1930s “death ray” to the radar network that helped defeat the Blitz

Filed under: Britain, History, Military, Science, Technology, WW2 — Tags: , , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

In a story from a few years back, Tim Harford outlines how a British Air Ministry prize for developing a “death ray” to use against enemy aircraft eventually helped kick off the discovery of radar:

The Chain Home radar tower in Great Baddow Chelmsford.
Photo by Stuart166axe via Wikimedia Commons.

… sometimes inventions need other inventions to unlock their full potential.

For the aviation industry, that story starts with the invention of the death ray, or at least an attempt to design a death ray, back in 1935.

Officials in the British Air Ministry were worried about falling behind Nazi Germany in the technological arms race.

The death ray idea intrigued them: they had been offering a £1,000 prize for anyone who could zap a sheep at a hundred paces. So far, nobody had claimed it.

But should they fund more active research? Was a death ray even possible?

Unofficially, they sounded out Robert Watson Watt, of the Radio Research Station.

And he posed an abstract maths question to his colleague Skip Wilkins.

“Suppose, just suppose,” said Watson Watt to Wilkins, “that you had eight pints of water, 1km [3,000ft] above the ground.

“And suppose that water was at 98F [37C], and you wanted to heat it to 105F.

“How much radio frequency power would you require, from a distance of 5km?”

Skip Wilkins was no fool.

He knew that eight pints was the amount of blood in an adult human, 98F was normal body temperature and 105F was warm enough to kill you, or at least make you pass out, which — if you’re behind the controls of an aeroplane — amounts to much the same thing.

So Wilkins and Watson Watt understood each other, and they quickly agreed the death ray was hopeless: it would take too much power.

But they also saw an opportunity.

Clearly, the ministry had some cash to spend on research. Perhaps Watson Watt and Wilkins could propose some alternative way for them to spend it?

Wilkins pondered. It might be possible, he suggested, to transmit radio waves and detect — from the echoes — the location of oncoming aircraft long before they could be seen.

Watson Watt dashed off a memo to the Air Ministry’s newly formed Committee for the Scientific Survey of Air Defence. Would they be interested in pursuing such an idea? They would indeed.

What Skip Wilkins was describing became known as radar.

Hitler’s Zipper: The MG-42 Universal Machine Gun

Filed under: Germany, History, Military, Weapons, WW2 — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Forgotten Weapons
Published 4 Nov 2020

http://www.patreon.com/ForgottenWeapons

https://www.floatplane.com/channel/Fo…

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The MG42 was developed to be a more reliable and easier to manufacture replacement for the MG34, although both would serve side by side until the end of World War Two. Designed by Grossfuss company engineer Werner Gruner with no previous military or small arms design experience, the MG42 used heavy stampings for its main assemblies, thus reducing German need for expensive and difficult to obtain alloyed steels.

As a practical matter, the MG42 had a much higher rate of fire than the MG34, at 1500-1600 rounds per minute (more than 50% faster than the MG34). This was deemed desirable to improve the effectiveness of suppressing fire and the density of the cone of fire, but naturally resulted in much higher ammunition consumption than other machine gun models.

This example is a very early production Gustloff example, with the early horizontal charging handle, unreinforced wooden stock, and adjustable front sight. It was most likely captured in North Africa from Rommel’s forces, as they were a primarily user of the very early MG42s.

Contact:
Forgotten Weapons
6281 N. Oracle #36270
Tucson, AZ 85740

February 5, 2021

Where Hitler’s Moustache Came From, Kurds in WW2, and Germans in Italy – WW2 – OOTF 020

Filed under: Europe, Germany, History, Italy, Military, WW2 — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

World War Two
Published 4 Feb 2021

Where is Kurdistan and how were its people involved in World War Two? Did Germany try to annex South Tyrol from Italy? And why did Hitler have that Moustache? Find out in this episode of Out of the Foxholes.

Join us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TimeGhostHistory
Or join The TimeGhost Army directly at: https://timeghost.tv

Follow WW2 day by day on Instagram @ww2_day_by_day – https://www.instagram.com/ww2_day_by_day
Between 2 Wars: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list…
Source list: http://bit.ly/WW2sources

Hosted by: Indy Neidell
Written by: Lewis Braithwaite, Ian Irungu, Timothy Smith
Director: Astrid Deinhard
Producers: Astrid Deinhard and Spartacus Olsson
Executive Producers: Astrid Deinhard, Indy Neidell, Spartacus Olsson, Bodo Rittenauer
Creative Producer: Maria Kyhle
Post-Production Director: Wieke Kapteijns
Research by: Lewis Braithwaite, Ian Irungu, Timothy Smith
Edited by: Michał Zbojna
Sound design: Marek Kamiński
Map animations: Eastory (https://www.youtube.com/c/eastory​)

Colorizations by:
Klimbim https://www.flickr.com/photos/2215569…​
Mikołaj Uchman

Icons from The Noun Project:
noun_Helmet_25216 Helmet by Daniel Turner
X by Richard Kuná

Soundtracks from Epidemic Sound:
“When in Bavaria” – Trabant 33
“Dawn Of Civilization” – Jo Wandrini (1)
“Ancient Discoveries” – Gabriel Lewis

Sources:
Bundesarchiv, Bild 137-055690
Bundesarchiv, Bild 137-055691

Archive by Screenocean/Reuters https://www.screenocean.com​.

A TimeGhost chronological documentary produced by OnLion Entertainment GmbH.

The 369th Infantry Regiment in WW1 – the “Harlem Hellfighters”

Filed under: France, Germany, History, Military, USA, WW1 — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

Lawrence W. Reed remembers the US regiment that spent the most days in combat during WW1 and was awarded the French Croix de Guerre for the unit’s incredible fighting efforts:

“Some of the colored men of the 369th (15th N.Y.) who won the Croix de Guerre for gallantry in action.” Left to right. Front row: Pvt. Ed Williams, Herbert Taylor, Pvt. Leon Fraitor, Pvt. Ralph Hawkins. Back Row: Sgt. H. D. Prinas, Sgt. Dan Strorms, Pvt. Joe Williams, Pvt. Alfred Hanley, and Cpl. T. W. Taylor.
Records of the War Department General and Special Staffs via Wikimedia Commons.

Formed from a New York National Guard unit, the men of the 369th learned basic military practices at Camp Whitman, New York, before being sent to Camp Wadsworth in Spartanburg, South Carolina, for combat training. They were not welcomed by many of the locals there, and some were subjected to discrimination and vile epithets for no more reason than their color. In December 1917, they were shipped to France where they expected to see action on the front lines.

Their high spirits were quickly dashed when it became apparent the Army did not want to deploy them for anything other than manual labor, far from the fighting. Even the rifles they brought with them were confiscated by US Army officials.

The commander of the American Expeditionary Force, General John J. Pershing, was reluctant to commit any US troops to the front until he felt he had assembled them in sufficient numbers to ensure victory. The French, meanwhile, were desperate for manpower. Finally bowing to French pressure, Pershing gave them the 369th. While some regarded black troops as expendable, they ultimately proved themselves indispensable.

Consider this amazing record of the Harlem Hellfighters: No American unit experienced more time in combat than they did — no less than 191 days under fire. They never lost an inch of ground. The enemy never captured a single of their number. They suffered the highest casualty rate of any US regiment. None deserted. The grateful French bestowed their highest military honor, the Croix de Guerre, upon the entire regiment. Many individuals of the regiment received the US Army’s second-highest award, the Distinguished Service Cross. Posthumously, Henry Johnson received America’s Medal of Honor in 2015. The 369th ended up as the most decorated US regiment of the war.

Another distinguishing feature of the Harlem Hellfighters was their band, the largest and best-known of any regiment. Its leader was James Reese Europe, whose enlistment in 1917 proved to be a boon for recruitment. He was one of America’s best-known black musicians and others like Noble Sissle, who became Europe’s lieutenant and lead vocalist, were eager to serve with him.

Europe’s band was extremely popular with the French, even when Europe introduced his own arrangement of La Marseillaise, France’s national anthem. The Hellfighters’ band brought both jazz and ragtime music to France, where nobody had heard either before.

Tank Chats #93 Humber Hornet | The Tank Museum

Filed under: Australia, Britain, History, Military, Weapons — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

The Tank Museum
Published 24 Jan 2020

Here David Fletcher takes a look at the Humber Hornet, a specialised air-deployable Armoured Fighting Vehicle. It was designed to carry the Malkara, an anti-tank guided missile developed by Australia and the United Kingdom.

Support the work of The Tank Museum on Patreon: ► https://www.patreon.com/tankmuseum

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February 4, 2021

The New World: A Beautiful Mess

Filed under: Americas, Britain, History, Media — Tags: , , , , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

Atun-Shei Films
Published 3 Feb 2021

A review of the Terrence Malick film The New World, a lavish and beautifully shot historical epic that nonetheless falls short in a few important ways.

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February 3, 2021

Just Following Orders? – Death Camp Commandants – WW2 Gallery

Filed under: Europe, Germany, History, Military, WW2 — Tags: , , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

World War Two
Published 2 Feb 2021

All Nazi transit, concentration, labour and extermination camps were led by Nazi officers. In this episode, we’re taking a look at some of them to see what kind of people rose to those positions and what impact they made.

The video Spartacus mentions about how Eicke created the Concentration Camp model is here: https://youtu.be/SjLFdw5u26s​

Join us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TimeGhostHistory
Or join The TimeGhost Army directly at: https://timeghost.tv

Follow WW2 day by day on Instagram @ww2_day_by_day – https://www.instagram.com/ww2_day_by_day
Between 2 Wars: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list…
Source list: http://bit.ly/WW2sources

Hosted by: Spartacus Olsson
Written by: Joram Appel and Spartacus Olsson
Director: Astrid Deinhard
Producers: Astrid Deinhard and Spartacus Olsson
Executive Producers: Astrid Deinhard, Indy Neidell, Spartacus Olsson, Bodo Rittenauer
Creative Producer: Maria Kyhle
Post-Production Director: Wieke Kapteijns
Research by: Joram Appel
Edited by: Iryna Dulka
Sound design: Marek Kamiński
Map animations: Eastory (https://www.youtube.com/c/eastory​)

Colorizations by:
– Mikołaj Uchman
– Norman Stewart – https://oldtimesincolor.blogspot.com/​

Sources:
– United States Holocaust Memorial Museum
– Bundesarchiv: 152-01-14, 152-01-26, 152-01-024, 119-0052-01, 152-01-16, 183-W0402-503, 152-23-10A, 152-26-27, 183-78612-0004, 146-2007-0068, 152-23-21A
– Yad Vashem: 202_65, 202_71, 4613_666, 202_169, 202_167, 202_133, 192-093, 11CO3, 192-006, 11FO7, 1137_208
– Watchtower by Eliricon from the Noun Project

Soundtracks from the Epidemic Sound:
– Gunnar Johnsen – “Not Safe Yet”
– Cobby Costa – “From the Past”
– Brightarm Orchestra – “On the Edge of Change”
– Phoenix Tail – “Last Minute Reaction”
– Christian Andersen – “Barrel”
– Farrell Wooten – “Rainy Landscapes”
– Flouw – “Endlessness”
– Wendel Scherer – “Defeated STEMS INSTRUMENTS”
– Craft Case – “Secret Cargo”

Archive by Screenocean/Reuters https://www.screenocean.com​.

A TimeGhost chronological documentary produced by OnLion Entertainment GmbH.

From the comments:

World War Two
5 hours ago (edited)
This is our first official “Gallery” episode. There are too many significant, impactful and interesting individuals to give them all their own Biography episodes. So we decided to bundle some of them together in categories in which they played a significant role, like the people who served as camp commandants in this episode. We will still do Biography specials when one individual story deserves to be told, but with the addition of this new format we will be able to cover a lot more and provide the broadest context to this immense war.

Fatah demands that Britain return Big Ben to its original Jerusalem home

Filed under: Britain, History, Middle East — Tags: , , , , , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

Daniel Greenfield unravels the historical misconceptions that informed the demand:

“Big Ben” by kev_zilla is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

“The Jerusalem Clock is hidden in London today,” Fatah, the political movement behind the PLO and the Palestinian Authority, asserts in a post titled, “Jerusalem Stolen Clock”.

It goes on to claim that the British military ordered the clock tower dismantled. Then the “British moved the clock first to a new tower across from the municipality of Jerusalem, and transferred it to the British Museum in London, to become the famous British icon, ‘Big Ben’.”

How did Big Ben, which was built in 1859, become a Muslim clock tower from the 20th century?

There are some other slight differences between London’s Big Ben and the “stolen clock” such as the fact that Big Ben is 316 feet tall while the “Palestinian” clock tower was only 42 feet.

But the story of the “Palestinian clock” is also the story of the entire myth of “Palestine”.

When you believe that the Jerusalem of King David and King Solomon was originally yours, you can just as easily believe that London’s Big Ben was originally the property of “Palestine”.

The “Palestinian clock” is as real as “Palestine”. The myth of a “Palestinian” people propounded by Fatah which has spent decades killing over it is also the story of the “Palestinian clock”.

There’s no more of a “Palestinian” people who were dispossessed by the Jews than Big Ben is a “Palestinian” clock stolen and passed off as London’s Big Ben. Both are fake history built out of resentments and garbled stories whose context has been lost, but whose hatreds remain real.

There were never any Palestinians. When the clock was built the region had been part of the Ottoman Empire, the last Caliphate until ISIS. The caliphates had settled it with Arab Muslim clans who dominated Christian refugees fleeing Muslim persecution, along with groups of other minorities from escaped slaves to gypsies, along with the indigenous Jewish population.

The Ottomans had become obsessed with clock towers as a symbol of their empire. But the Ottomans hadn’t invented them, they had adopted them from Europe, and planted them in major cities of the empire to create a common sense of time and belonging for their subjects.

Sultan Abdul Hamid II, the last real sultan of the empire, obsessively erected clock towers to show off how modern the Ottoman Empire was. But by then the Empire was anything but modern and Hamid’s clock tower craze was powered by his German allies. Kaiser Wilhelm II gave Hamid a batch of clocks at the turn of the century which the Turks put into clock towers.

The Ottoman Empire erected some of its clock towers in Israel. These clock towers utilized the talents and funds of the indigenous Jewish and the Arab Muslim settler population. The clock tower projects in Israel began in 1901 which is also the date when Wilhelm sent Hamid a whole bunch of clocks. One of these clock towers was stuck on Jerusalem’s Jaffa Gate which Hamid had previously cut a hole in so that the Kaiser could enter Jerusalem in his tall plumed helmet.

H/T to Kate at SDA for the link.

Germany’s WW1 “Kurz” Model Tankgewehr

Filed under: Germany, History, Military, Weapons, WW1 — Tags: , , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Forgotten Weapons
Published 29 Oct 2020

http://www.patreon.com/ForgottenWeapons

https://www.floatplane.com/channel/Fo…

Cool Forgotten Weapons merch! http://shop.bbtv.com/collections/forg…

When the German Tankgewehr was introduced in May 1918, the first 300 or so guns were of a different pattern than the standard production that would follow (and of which about 16,000 would be made). The Kurz model had a barrel about 4 inches shorter than the standard, and was about 2 pounds heavier, because that barrel (although shorter) was much larger in diameter than the standard pattern.

Contact:
Forgotten Weapons
6281 N. Oracle #36270
Tucson, AZ 85740

February 2, 2021

.38 ACP Webley-Fosbery Automatic Revolver

Filed under: Britain, History, Weapons — Tags: , , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Forgotten Weapons
Published 11 Nov 2020

http://www.patreon.com/ForgottenWeapons

https://www.floatplane.com/channel/Fo…

Cool Forgotten Weapons merch! http://shop.bbtv.com/collections/forg…

The rarest variation of the Webley-Fosbery automatic revolver is the .38 ACP model. Only 341 of these were made by Webley, in an attempt to compete with the new semiautomatic pistols appearing on the market — most notably the Colt Model 1900 and Model 1902. The Colt was chambered for .38 ACP, a remarkable cartridge for its time — high velocity and semi-rimmed. Webley figured that an 8-shot Fosbery-type revolver would offer the same capacity and ballistics as the new Colt, but in a revolver format familiar to the British market. The design could load cartridges individually, but also offered use of an 8-shot moon clip. Unfortunately for Webley, British legislation in 1903 hampered civilian handgun ownership and the military was not interested at all because the bore was too small. Of the 341 originally made, some were finally converted to .455 caliber after years of sitting unsold in Webley’s warehouse.

This model makes a notable appearance in Dashiell Hammett’s novel The Maltese Falcon, which quite specifically identifies it as an 8-shot, .38 caliber Webley-Fosbery. In the movie version, Humphrey Bogart mistakenly says it is an 8-shot .45, however…

Contact:
Forgotten Weapons
6281 N. Oracle #36270
Tucson, AZ 85740

February 1, 2021

Battle of Hong Kong 1941 – Pacific War

Filed under: Britain, Cancon, China, History, India, Japan, Military, Pacific, WW2 — Tags: , — Nicholas @ 04:00

Kings and Generals
Published 31 Jan 2021

The first 100 people to go to https://www.blinkist.com/kingsandgenerals are going to get unlimited access for 1 week to try it out. You’ll also get 25% off if you want the full membership

Kings and Generals 3d animated historical documentary series on modern warfare continues with a video on the battle of Hong Kong of 1941. Japanese Empire is waging another Sino-Japanese war against China and decides that it is time to take over Hong Kong, as the British were using it to supply the Chinese. This battle is considered one of the first in the Pacific War within World War II.

Support us on Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/KingsandGenerals or Paypal: http://paypal.me/kingsandgenerals. We are grateful to our patrons and sponsors, who made this video possible: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o…

The video was made by Leif Sick, while the script was developed by Ivan Moran. The video was narrated by Officially Devin (https://www.youtube.com/user/OfficiallyDevin)

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Production Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound: http://www.epidemicsound.com

#Documentary #HongKong #PacificWar

January 31, 2021

Fortress Singapore Stands Alone! – WW2 – 127 – January 30, 1942

Filed under: Britain, Germany, History, Japan, Military, Pacific, Russia, USA, WW2 — Tags: , , , , , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

World War Two
Published 30 Jan 2021

The Japanese advance on Singapore has gotten close enough that the British have destroyed the causeway to Singapore Island. The Japanese are also making attacks in the Solomon Islands, Burma, the Philippines, and the Dutch East Indies — their threat to Australia is real. Erwin Rommel’s surprise spoiler offensive in North Africa takes Benghazi, and on the eastern front the Soviets break a hole in the German lines in the north even as the temperature drops to the -50s.

Join us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TimeGhostHistory
Or join The TimeGhost Army directly at: https://timeghost.tv

Follow WW2 day by day on Instagram @ww2_day_by_day – https://www.instagram.com/ww2_day_by_day
Between 2 Wars: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list…
Source list: http://bit.ly/WW2sources

Written and Hosted by: Indy Neidell
Director: Astrid Deinhard
Producers: Astrid Deinhard and Spartacus Olsson
Executive Producers: Astrid Deinhard, Indy Neidell, Spartacus Olsson, Bodo Rittenauer
Creative Producer: Maria Kyhle
Post-Production Director: Wieke Kapteijns
Research by: Indy Neidell
Edited by: Iryna Dulka
Sound design: Marek Kamiński
Map animations: Eastory (https://www.youtube.com/c/eastory)

Colorizations by:
– Mikołaj Uchman
– Jaris Almazani (Artistic Man) – https://instagram.com/artistic.man
– Norman Stewart – https://oldtimesincolor.blogspot.com/

Sources:
– JoJan, Berserker276 – from Wikimedia Commons
– National Portrait Gallery
– Termometer by Andi Nur Abdillah from the Noun Project
– Bundesarchiv – Bild 101I-811-1881-33
– Mil.ru

Soundtracks from the Epidemic Sound:
– Rannar Sillard – “Easy Target”
– Jo Wandrini – “Dragon King”
– Rannar Sillard – “Split Decision”
– Craft Case – “Secret Cargo”
– Reynard Seidel – “Rush of Blood”
– Flouw – “A Far Cry”
– Fabien Tell – “Weapon of Choice”
– Johan Hynynen – “Dark Beginning”
– Gunnar Johnsen – “Not Safe Yet”
– Fabien Tell – “Last Point of Safe Return”

Archive by Screenocean/Reuters https://www.screenocean.com.

A TimeGhost chronological documentary produced by OnLion Entertainment GmbH.

Adapting Noël Coward’s Blithe Spirit for the screen – “The ensuring film has all the light charm and witty élan of a documentary about slaughterhouses”

Filed under: Britain, Media — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

At The Critic, Alexander Larman is not happy with the latest attempt to translate a Coward play to the big or small screen:

Original theatrical release poster.
Wikimedia Commons.

Recently, the new film of Noël Coward’s masterly play Blithe Spirit was released on various streaming services, after its cinematic release was cancelled due to the irritating absence of open cinemas to show it. I had been looking forward to it for some time. It had a fine cast of hugely talented comic actors, led by Dan Stevens and including Isla Fisher, Leslie Mann, Julian Rhind-Tutt, and, in the great role of the fraudulent medium Madame Arcati, none other than Judi Dench. It was directed by Peter Hall’s talented son Edward, and its inspiration remains one of the most uproariously entertaining plays of the twentieth century, complete with some of Coward’s finest dialogue. It would be hard to mess it up.

Alas, “messed up” is an understatement when it comes to describe what has happened to the film. A clue comes in the credit: “adapted by Piers Ashworth, Meg Leonard and Nick Moorcroft”. The three of them were previously responsible for the mediocre sea-shanty comedy (not words one often writes) Fishermen’s Friends, and Ashworth and Moorcroft should be prosecuted at the cinematic equivalent of the Hague for their shameful bastardisation of Ronald Searle’s St Trinian’s series into two terrible films that bear as much relation to Searle’s illustrations as they do to Noël Coward. So it is little surprise that they have decided to “improve” on the original play. The writers throw out most of the original dialogue, retain only the bare bones of the storyline, introduce an irrelevant and mawkish subplot for Madame Arcati (who is now bewilderingly played mostly straight) and generally commit artistic vandalism.

The ensuring film has all the light charm and witty élan of a documentary about slaughterhouses. The cast do their best with the terrible material, but as Stevens manfully tries to make lines about erectile dysfunction amusing – “Mr Peasbody’s got stage fright” – the look of deep shame that occasionally comes over their faces cannot be disguised by the over-bright lighting and incongruously jaunty music. Had it been given a cinematic release, there may well have been indignant walkouts and outraged complaints at the box office. As is, I doubt that many disappointed viewers, expecting a more enjoyable film, will bother watching this travesty to the end.

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