Quotulatiousness

May 12, 2019

A handy list for your next band name

Filed under: Humour, Media — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

An amusing Twitter thread from a few days ago threw up some entertaining band name suggestions:




I’m pretty sure that Multiaxial System opened for Estrus Peak at the El Mocambo in ’94.

May 11, 2019

QotD: The Coolidge Effect

Filed under: History, Humour, Quotations, Science, USA — Tags: , — Nicholas @ 01:00

Behavioral endocrinologist Frank A. Beach first mentioned the term “Coolidge effect” in publication in 1955, crediting one of his students with suggesting the term at a psychology conference. He attributed the neologism to:

    … an old joke about Calvin Coolidge when he was President … The President and Mrs. Coolidge were being shown [separately] around an experimental government farm. When [Mrs. Coolidge] came to the chicken yard she noticed that a rooster was mating very frequently. She asked the attendant how often that happened and was told, “Dozens of times each day.” Mrs. Coolidge said, “Tell that to the President when he comes by.” Upon being told, the President asked, “Same hen every time?” The reply was, “Oh, no, Mr. President, a different hen every time.” President: “Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge.”

The joke appears in a 1978 book (A New Look at Love, by Elaine Hatfield and G. William Walster, p. 75), citing an earlier source (footnote 19, Chapter 5).

“Coolidge Effect”, Wikipedia.

May 7, 2019

QotD: Competitive Wokeness

Filed under: Education, Humour, Politics, Quotations — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 01:00

I love competitive #Wokeness.

No, seriously — it’s high time you people out in the real world got to experience one of the defining joys of life in the ivory tower. In the ivy-covered halls of academe, the Marxist Postcolonialist Feminsts have longstanding beef with the Postcolonialist Feminist Marxists. They’d each happily feed the other into a wood chipper, even though to outsiders it would look like the pot executing the kettle for counterrevolutionary crimes. If you’re the sort who takes schadenfreudy delight in very obvious folly, university life is hilarious.

It’s even funnier if you take these buffoons at their word. Compared to the pronouncements of your average Angry Studies professor, Pol Pot was a sane and balanced man. In reality, of course, university people are so soft and coddled, they make the Eloi look like the Sons of Anarchy. Spending so much time around college folk is one of the main reasons for my mantra: “Today’s SJW is tomorrow’s obergruppenfuhrer.” They talk a fearsome game, these campus Ches, but they cry if the cafeteria is out of free trade sustainably sourced indigenous grown gluten free soy milk. When the zeitgeist shifts, they’ll be the first to knuckle under.

Severian, “The Reluctant Revolutionary”, Rotten Chestnuts, 2019-04-05.

May 6, 2019

QotD: Political scandals

Filed under: Business, Humour, Politics, Quotations, USA — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 01:00

If you say “Clinton scandal,” the first thing that comes to mind for most people, at least for those of us old enough to have been around for Bill Clinton’s presidency, is Monica Lewinsky. That’s a shame: I am convinced that Hillary Rodham Clinton’s cattle-futures shenanigans were in fact a much more serious offense as a matter of public corruption. But most people don’t understand futures trading. Everybody understands diddling the interns. Nobody understands finance. Everybody understands sex.

(Except Objectivists.)

That’s why financial scandals rarely end political careers, but sex scandals often do, especially for Republicans.

Kevin D. Williamson, “Fanciful Trump ‘Scandals'”, National Review, 2017-04-16.

May 5, 2019

QotD: A growing French industry

Filed under: Books, Economics, Europe, France, Humour, Quotations — Tags: , — Nicholas @ 01:00

The French, I think, must be world champions in the production of books lamenting the state of their economy (they are also good at taking antidepressants). Occasionally, it is true, someone writes a book to the effect that things are not so very bad in France, in fact that they are really quite good, at least by comparison with everywhere else; but this is so contrary to the majority of what is written that it has the quality of whistling in the wind. If the French economy had grown at the rate at which books are published predicting its imminent collapse, it would be flourishing indeed.

Theodore Dalrymple, “Beneath Paris”, Taki’s Magazine, 2017-01-07.

May 2, 2019

Chicken Tikka Masala | Basics with Babish

Filed under: Food, Humour, India — Tags: — Nicholas @ 02:00

Binging with Babish
Published on 28 Mar 2019

Enter offer code “Babish” at Squarespace.com for 10% off your first purchase, or visit: http://smarturl.it/BWBsquarespace

One of my favorite curries is the beloved chicken tikka masala. You can make this dish at home by making your own curry powder and tikka masala sauce.

Shopping List:
+ For the curry powder:
1 stick cinnamon
1 whole nutmeg
2 dried bay leaves
1 Tbsp whole cloves
2 Tbsp cumin seeds
3 Tbsp coriander seeds
1 Tbsp cardamom
1 tsp red pepper flakes

+ For the chicken tikka masala marinade:
1 cup full fat yogurt
2 inches ginger, grated
2 garlic cloves, grated
1 Tbsp of the homemade curry powder (above)
Kosher salt
Freshly ground pepper
Drizzle of olive oil
3 boneless, skinless, chicken breasts (cut into 1-inch cubes)

+ For the tikka masala sauce
2 inches ginger, grated
1/2 small yellow onion, finely minced
2 cloves garlic, grated
1 small bird’s eye chili, finely minced
2 Tbsp vegetable oil
1 Tbsp tomato paste
1 heaping Tbsp homemade curry powder (above)
1 28-ounce can of crushed tomatoes
Pinch of white sugar
3/4 cup heavy cream

Optional: serve with long grain basmati rice and cilantro garnish

Special Equipment:
Spice grinder or coffee grinder

H/T to Victor for the link.

April 30, 2019

You Will Never Do Anything Remarkable

Filed under: Health, History, Humour, Space — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 06:00

exurb1a
Published on 28 Apr 2019

Illegitimi non carborundum, yo.

So.
The original line was, “If they give you ruled paper, write the other way.” As far as I can tell it’s Juan Ramón Jiménez’s.

I am also now painfully aware I’ve written a half as ‘2/1’. Sorry maths.

Please note that this wasn’t intended to be a diatribe against critics or experts. They obviously play an important role. It was more directed at the recreational cynicism one comes across in daily life from time to time, generally pointed at young artists. I have had the privilege to meet plenty of people 1000x more talented than me, who are simultaneously doubting their abilities because of some stupid comment made by an unpleasant teacher or jaded family member.

If you are that artist, I really just wanted to say: You’re in good company; the Greats doubted themselves too. Don’t let the bastards get you down and I hope you make all manner of interesting and fantastic things.

The music is the 3rd movement of Big Baus Brahms’ Violin Concerto in D Major: https://youtu.be/Ev45Knhdlp8

I like that piece lots. I hope you do too.

Again, all the very best of luck in your projects.

An NFL coach admits he has a problem

Filed under: Football, Humour — Tags: , , , — Nicholas @ 03:00

The NFL is a high-pressure environment, with big money and big temptations ready to befall even the steadiest of people. Sometimes, they can’t handle the situation themselves and have to look for help … and people in the NFL are not used to looking for help. It can be quite a trial, but sometimes, as Ted Glover recounts, help can be found:

The coach has a problem, but he’s trying to get better

Scene: A dingy basement of what looks to be a Missouri Synod Lutheran church or maybe a VFW hall. In the room are about twenty or so people, sitting on metal folding chairs, sipping on bad coffee. A tall, lanky guy with a scruffy beard and nondescript clothing stands at a podium at the front of the gathering.

‘Thanks for making it today. I’m glad to see each and every one of you, and you are all welcome here. Would anyone like to come up and share their story?’

The gathered people shift uncomfortably in their seats, avoiding eye contact, some with their arms folded. After what seems like an eternity, a lone figure hesitantly stands, in jeans and a short sleeved purple golf shirt.

‘Hi, and thank you, come right up,’ says the man at the podium, as he slips off to the side, motioning the man forward. The man in the crowd shuffles to the front.

He looks fairly unremarkable, mid-60’s probably, with a weather beaten face. Of course, everyone who’s here is beaten, in some way. Everyone is broken, trying to heal. The man now at the podium is no different.

‘Hello,’ he says haltingly, almost afraid to continue.

‘It’s okay, we’re all friends here. There’s no judgement, and what we say here stays here,’ says a kind, matronly looking woman in the crowd, encouraging him to share his story.

The man smiles, ever so slightly. It’s his first smile in what…weeks, months? Years, maybe? He finds a little more courage.

‘Hello,’ he says again, a little stronger. ‘My name is Mike, and I’m cornerbackaholic.’

‘HI MIKE’ the crowd replies in unison, their greeting echoing off the peeling paint on the cinder block walls.

‘’Uh…so…it’s been one draft since I haven’t taken a cornerback in the first two rounds. And I gotta tell ya, it’s been the hardest draft of my life. But I’m moving forward, and I feel good.’

‘Mmmmm-hmmmmm’ says someone in the crowd.

‘It’s weird,’ Mike continues, ‘I never saw myself here, in this spot. Corners were just kind of a hobby for most of my life. I got introduced to them in high school, like I imagine a lot of you did. I was a quarterback, and I mostly avoided them, you know? But then I got to college, and I switched over to defense. I played linebacker, and just sort of got introduced to them more gradually. I guess that’s when I started my downward spiral, but I didn’t recognize it then.’

James May explains the time he nearly killed Jeremy Clarkson

Filed under: Americas, Humour, Media — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

DRIVETRIBE
Published on 31 Mar 2019

With the Grand Tour trio having been on camera together for over 16 years now, you can forgive them for getting annoyed at each other every once in a while. James May tells us the story of a night in Argentina that put his friendship with Jeremy Clarkson to the test. One piece of advice for everyone out there – don’t let the fire go out.

April 29, 2019

Father of The Bride Speech – Rowan Atkinson

Filed under: Britain, Humour — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Ralph Lindberg
Published on 16 Jan 2010

Looking for great father of the bride speech? How about this father of the bride speech from Rowan Atkinson aka Mr. Bean

April 26, 2019

QotD: European jokes about the neighbours

Filed under: Europe, France, Humour, Quotations — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 01:00

… it is also the Finns who snicker at overbearing Swedes (“What’s the difference between the Swedes and the Finns? The Swedes have got nice neighbours”); and the Portuguese, who mock Spanish arrogance (“In a recent survey, 11 out of 10 Spaniards said they felt superior to the others”).

There are the Irish, who joke about buttoned-up Brits (“What’s the English definition of a thrill? Having an After Eight at 7.30”); and the Poles, who have a go at the Germans for pretty much anything (“German footballers are like German food: if they’re not imported from Poland they’re no good”).

Making fun of our best enemies, said Romain Seignovert, who has just published a book on the jokes Europeans tell about their neighbours, is a great European tradition. “We are a big, diverse community with a centuries-long common history of highs and lows, and our humour reflects that,” he says.

[…]

There is a deeper point. Ultimately, Seignovert said, laughing at our neighbours is “recognising, even celebrating, our particularities. It shows we’re not indifferent. Europe isn’t just political and economic, it’s also cultural – about all these nations, living together. The EU hasn’t made enough of that.”

That may be true. But Seignovert, remember, is French, so what he says should clearly not be taken too seriously. In the words of one particularly fine Belgian quip: “How does a Frenchman commit suicide? By shooting 15cm above his head, right in the middle of his superiority complex.”

Jon Henley, “‘Crude, but rarely nasty’: The jokes Europeans tell about their neighbours”, The Guardian, 2016-05-08.

April 24, 2019

Vikings GM Rick Spielman’s pre-draft press conference, as interpreted by Don Glover

Filed under: Football, Humour — Tags: , , — Nicholas @ 06:00

It’s almost time for the NFL’s 2019 draft, and everyone is sick to death of mock drafts by this point. Everyone’s cousin’s mechanic’s hairdresser has submitted multiple mocks so far, and the one thing that’s for certain is that none of them are right. When the real draft starts, the general manager for the Minnesota Vikings and 31 GMs for other, lesser teams will begin the televised high stakes poker and swap shop that is the modern NFL draft. On Tuesday, Rick Spielman got up in front of the Twin Cities media and lied his head off discussed his draft plan and philosophy. As the Daily Norseman‘s Ted Glover explains, you can’t actually trust anything any of the GMs say at this time of year, but most especially good ol’ “Trader” Rick:

When Rick Spielman talks, we listen. REALLY listen.

Right now, there is an elite fraternity of 32 men who are being paid millions of dollar to try and bluff, lie and cajole their way into the draft class of their dreams, while trying to deny their other 31 fraternity brothers the draft class of THEIR dreams.

It’s a fascinating social experiment, and God forgive me but I LOVE this time of year. Who’s telling the truth, who’s floating trial balloons, and who’s flat out lying has become the best reality television in the country today, if you ask me.

“But Ted” you say to yourself, “why do you enjoy grown millionaires lie about sports to each other? You have grandchildren now, don’t you want to expose them to honorable men, doing honorable things?”

LOL sure, but this is just sports, so let’s lighten up a bit.

So why do I like this? Because of the GM the Vikings have, one Rick Spielman, Professional Football Man of Leisure. Spielman has taken the pre-draft subterfuge to levels not seen since the height of the Cold War, and no it wouldn’t surprise me if he runs dead drops and counterintelligence operations all the time.

So when Spielman holds court with reporters prior to the draft, it’s must-watch TV. But one cannot take Rick Spielman’s words at face value. No, no no no no noooooooo sir. Do that, and you’ll be disappointed when the Vikings first four picks aren’t a kicker, a punter, and two long snappers. You need to understand nuance, what’s real and what isn’t, and a full comprehension of the technical term we call pre-draft bullshit.

That’s why I am here.* I am the World’s Self Proclaimed Rickspeak Expert, having obtained my PhD from Normandale Community College in the subject.** What I do is take what Rick says and translate it into what he REALLY means.***

* Of all the reasons in the world as to why I’m still here, this is like second to last.

** Okay fine, it was just a Master’s

*** I make up everything. Nothing is real. Welcome to the Matrix, Neo.

April 13, 2019

History Summarized: Steel (Feat. “That Works”)

Filed under: Europe, History, Humour, India, Japan, Middle East, Science, Technology, Weapons — Tags: , , , , , — Nicholas @ 04:00

Overly Sarcastic Productions
Published on 12 Apr 2019

More from Matt & Ilya on “That Works”: https://bit.ly/2D0A6qk

More about steel from Shadiversity:
— “When Was Steel Invented” https://bit.ly/2uSwcvh
— “The Riddle of Steel” https://bit.ly/2G6TB28
— “The Oldest Steel Sword” https://bit.ly/2VvWVZZ

CORRECTION from 12:10 — The back of a Katana after differential hardening process is a lower-carbon STEEL, but it is still Steel rather than Iron. My mistake. The higher-carbon content Martensite forms the cutting edge, and low-carbon steel forms the spine.

BLUE’S BOOK: Philosophicalphridays.com

PATREON: https://www.Patreon.com/OSP

April 9, 2019

Blue’s Dumb History Tales

Filed under: Britain, China, Economics, History, Humour — Tags: , , , , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Overly Sarcastic Productions
Published on 8 Mar 2019

Please check out That Works for the best blacksmithing on YouTube: https://goo.gl/vXsuFt

What do you get when you cross a month that has 5 Fridays with a historian who can’t do math? This nonsense, apparently.

PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/OSP

April 5, 2019

If Shakespearean Insults Were Used Today – Anglophenia Ep 13

Filed under: Britain, History, Humour — Tags: , — Nicholas @ 02:00

Anglophenia
Published on 24 Sep 2014

Siobhan Thompson reacts to everyday office frustrations with some barbs from the Bard. Check out the Shakespeare plays from which the insults originated here: http://www.bbcamerica.com/anglophenia…

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