Despite our decade-long vacation from economic development, common sense, and growth, there appears to be one key area where Canada is a world-beater: inventing euphemisms for physician-induced death:
“See that guy over there, Mugsy?”
“Yeah, boss.”
“He needs to be provisioned.”
“You got it, boss.”
I have a small collection of euphemisms for killings, curious deaths and murder. Most of them are comedic, like Wodehouse’s “handing in his dinner pail”. You know the serious ones: expedited, eliminated, liquidated, liberated (from Real Genius), handled, disappeared, etc.
So you can imagine how thrilled I was to discover a new one, invented by Canadian doctors: provisioned.
You are provisioned when a doctor slips you the needle or some pills, on purpose, to send you instantly to your Particular Judgment. (The doctors will get theirs at later dates, and boy wouldn’t you like to be, as they say, a fly on the cloud for those.)
Doctors — white-coated physician killers, we can call them Rxecutioners — are increasingly enjoying collecting paychecks to kill Canadians.
According to the official “Sixth Annual Report on Medical Assistance in Dying in Canada“, 16,499 ex-Canadians were produced, or rather provisioned, in 2024. Some 22,535 applied, but 4,017 of them cheated their Rxecutioner by dying early. Can you picture the dejected look on the killer-doctor’s face, his needle poised, poisoned and dripping, only to find his customer left without him? Sad.
These numbers were up from 2023, but the rate of growth of killings (provisionings) has slowed; it was 6.9% from 2023 to 2024. If that deceleration stays about the same, Rxecutioners will put some 17,500 under in 2025. And slightly more than that in 2026.
“The vast majority (95.6%),” of those slaughtered, “identified as Caucasian (White)”. Rxecutioner provisionings are the one area where Canadian rulers allow Whites to excel. Incidentally, what’s with “identified”? Maybe Canadian rulers will let people identify as different races.
But never mind all that. The report is a wonderful, almost pristine, example of pure Expertism, the perfect blend of scientism and bright red euphemism. All should read it.
