You Suck At Cooking
Published 23 Dec 2020This sugar cookie recipe is super easy, just like things that aren’t difficult. They also have something in common with Christmas cookies: you can find them both on planet earth, which is the fifth largest planet in our solar system.
1/2 pound softened butter
1 cup of sugar
cream them together with your gyrowangucopterlatorThen add:
1 jangled egg
3 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
then rejangle with your handheld copterwanglerIn another bowl sift together:
3 cups all purpose flour
¾ teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon saltthen dump the baking snow onto your butter cloud and recopterize with your dough typhoon but feel free to fold it together with your spatulator first to avoid a dust storm
At this point you should have dough but if you doughn’t then add another tablespoon of milk until you have dough (and if you have goo try adding some more wheat dust)
lay the dough down to sleep on plastic wrap (one folded sheet) then throw it in the
temperature reducer for an hour or twothen remove it from the heat remover and if it’s really cold let it warm up a bit, otherwise start
pressing and rolling it out until it’s 1/4 inch thick unless you’re not making cookiesthen just do your thing, you know, making shapes and whatnot and bake them for 12 minutes on 350
If you want to make icing take 1 cup of powdered sugar and add a couple teaspoons of corn syrup and a couple teaspoons of water … you can add more corn syrup and less water or just keep adding corn syrup, it’s really up to you. I did one where all I added was maple syrup and that was interesting although you can barely taste the maple over the powdered sugar, but what I learned from this is holy cow does corn syrup ever taste good. As an adult I’ve been in this mentality that corn syrup is the worst and why would you ever eat that and I tasted it for the first time in years and it was like eating caramel for the first time. I think I chugged that stuff when I was a kid and wanted candy because it’s liquid candy. Anyway, what I’m saying is I recommend corn syrup. Even though it comes from corn, which is not recommended.
December 23, 2025
Christmas Cookies – You Suck at Cooking (episode 120)
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