{"id":97314,"date":"2025-08-25T03:00:49","date_gmt":"2025-08-25T07:00:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/?p=97314"},"modified":"2025-08-24T12:58:02","modified_gmt":"2025-08-24T16:58:02","slug":"defending-your-life-against-an-intruder-can-get-you-charged-in-canada","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/2025\/08\/25\/defending-your-life-against-an-intruder-can-get-you-charged-in-canada\/","title":{"rendered":"Defending your life against an intruder can get you charged in Canada"},"content":{"rendered":"

Terry Burton<\/a>‘s satire-that-is-too-close-to-being-true:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

A Recent Case in Ontario<\/strong><\/p>\n

An Ontario man recently had the unthinkable happen: he defended his home. Unfortunately for him, this occurred in Canada, where the laws surrounding self-defence have taken a dive off the deep end of “wokeness”. The police, after deep reflection (and a healthy dose of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion training), chose to charge the homeowner<\/strong> and not the intruder. Why?<\/p>\n

Let’s break down the madness.<\/p>\n

How a Home Invasion Might Go in 2025 Canada:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Homeowner<\/strong> (middle-class taxpayer, not currently oppressed):
\n“Hello, sir. You appear to have broken into my home and possess a 7-inch knife. May I inquire about your intentions?”<\/p>\n

Intruder<\/strong> (career criminal with a social media following):
\n“I’m just here to grab some electronics, steal your monies, and stab someone if they resist my incursion. It depends on my mood. Don’t profile me.”<\/p>\n

Homeowner<\/strong>:
\n“Of course. My apologies. Would you like a latte while you loot my home? Oat milk? Almond? I don’t want to assume.”<\/p>\n

Intruder<\/strong>:
\n“You’re a colonialist bigot for offering me food.”<\/p>\n

Homeowner<\/strong>:
\n“Understood. Legally, I’m only allowed to resist you in proportion to your level of violence \u2014 yet to be ascertained, as determined by a tribunal of academics who’ve never been in a fist fight. That means if you punch me, I can … maybe glare at you. Anything more, and I’m the criminal.”<\/p>\n

But what if the homeowner fights back?<\/strong><\/p>\n

In this case, the homeowner managed to grab a knife and defend himself. The intruder was injured \u2014 tragically \u2014 during this altercation. So naturally, the police arrived and did what any reasonable, DEI officer was instructed s\/he must do:<\/p>\n

They charged the homeowner<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

The intruder? Off to the hospital, flowers sent courtesy of the Canadian taxpayer, and full support from victim services (taxpayer funded). (Yes, really.)<\/p>\n

Reasons Police and Prosecutors Declined to Charge the Intruder (some say over-the-top satirical conjecture by the author)<\/strong>:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Mental illness<\/strong> \u2013 A catch-all excuse for immunity.<\/li>\n
  2. Homelessness<\/strong> \u2013 Makes all actions justifiable, including assault.<\/li>\n
  3. Drug addiction<\/strong> \u2013 A disease, not a crime, apparently.<\/li>\n
  4. Identifies as female<\/strong> \u2013 We must respect self-identification, even during felonies.<\/li>\n
  5. Arrested 55 times, 20 for B&Es<\/strong> \u2013 Systemic failure, so we shouldn’t blame him again.<\/li>\n
  6. Member of a marginalized group<\/strong> \u2013 Intersectionality shields all.<\/li>\n
  7. Single-parent upbringing<\/strong> \u2013 Automatically voids criminal responsibility.<\/li>\n
  8. Not yet a citizen<\/strong> \u2013 A conviction could hinder his application; we, the state machinery that is, must protect him.<\/li>\n
  9. Linked to child porn<\/strong> \u2013 But not convicted, so hands off.<\/li>\n
  10. Terrorist affiliations<\/strong> \u2013 Political beliefs are personal.<\/li>\n
  11. Anti-Semitic<\/strong> \u2013 But it’s culturally complex, they say.<\/li>\n
  12. Illegally entered Canada<\/strong> \u2013 A paperwork issue, not a crime.<\/li>\n
  13. Gun and drug trafficking<\/strong> \u2013 He’s an entrepreneur, really.<\/li>\n
  14. Anti-Christian<\/strong> \u2013 Expressing a valid worldview.<\/li>\n
  15. Anti\u2013Rule of Law<\/strong> \u2013 Which now appears to be mainstream.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    The Verdict?<\/strong><\/p>\n

    The homeowner is:<\/p>\n

      \n
    • Charged<\/strong> with attempted murder<\/em>.<\/li>\n
    • Convicted<\/strong> of using “excessive force”.<\/li>\n
    • Sued<\/strong> in civil court by the intruder.<\/li>\n
    • Ordered<\/strong> to surrender his house and retirement savings.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      The intruder is:<\/p>\n

        \n
      • Awarded<\/strong> the home he broke into.<\/li>\n
      • Given<\/strong> legal permission to rent the house back to the homeowner’s family.<\/li>\n
      • Allowed<\/strong> to visit the property at will.<\/li>\n
      • Celebrated<\/strong> in local media for “surviving trauma”.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

        What Happened to Common Sense?<\/strong><\/p>\n

        It died somewhere between Bill C-18<\/em>, Bill C-63<\/em>, and the idea that your lived experience matters more than actual law. In a country where, in some jurisdictions, whistling at night is outlawed, but breaking into homes is a misunderstood cry for help, we’ve lost the thread entirely.<\/p>\n

        When defending your family is labelled aggression, and violating someone’s home is rebranded asocial<\/em> protest, Canada ceases to be a democracy and becomes a farce.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

        Terry Burton‘s satire-that-is-too-close-to-being-true: A Recent Case in Ontario An Ontario man recently had the unthinkable happen: he defended his home. Unfortunately for him, this occurred in Canada, where the laws surrounding self-defence have taken a dive off the deep end of “wokeness”. The police, after deep reflection (and a healthy dose of Diversity, Equity, and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,57,9,10],"tags":[343,87,463,98,1020],"class_list":["post-97314","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cancon","category-humour","category-law","category-liberty","tag-crimeandpunishment","tag-ontario","tag-parody","tag-police","tag-progressives"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2hpV6-pjA","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97314","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=97314"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97314\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":97316,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97314\/revisions\/97316"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=97314"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=97314"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=97314"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}