{"id":9391,"date":"2011-05-17T09:43:30","date_gmt":"2011-05-17T13:43:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/?p=9391"},"modified":"2013-09-25T10:17:34","modified_gmt":"2013-09-25T15:17:34","slug":"whos-going-to-feed-fluffy-if-you-get-taken-up-in-the-rapture","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/2011\/05\/17\/whos-going-to-feed-fluffy-if-you-get-taken-up-in-the-rapture\/","title":{"rendered":"Who&#8217;s going to feed Fluffy if you get taken up in the Rapture?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Sorry, of course I mean <b><em>when<\/em><\/b> you leave for your seat at the right hand of God. For a small advance fee, you can be (relatively) certain that Fluffy or Rover will be seen to by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theregister.co.uk\/2011\/05\/17\/judgment_day\/\" target=\"_blank\">After The Rapture Pet Care<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>In case you hadn&#8217;t heard, Judgment Day is pencilled in for 21 May and any Christians among you who hadn&#8217;t made provision for your pets&#8217; wellbeing after the Rapture had better pull your fingers out before you take your place at God&#8217;s right hand and your poor moggy is left stuck here on Earth staring at an empty bowl.<\/p>\n<p>Make no mistake, this is serious. Harold Camping, the 89-year-old founder of Family Radio, has spent years scouring the Bible for evidence of just when it&#8217;s time for believers to pack their celestial suitcases. True, they had to unpack again back in September 2004 following Camping&#8217;s first shot at naming the big day, but he assures that this time it is &#8220;absolutely going to happen without any question&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>So, you&#8217;re ascending to eternal glory and your cat&#8217;s litter needs changing. It&#8217;s an upsetting thought for any true follower of Christ, but help is at hand in the form of another creature absolutely guaranteed to be left behind by the heavenly mass exodus: the atheist.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sorry, of course I mean when you leave for your seat at the right hand of God. For a small advance fee, you can be (relatively) certain that Fluffy or Rover will be seen to by After The Rapture Pet Care: In case you hadn&#8217;t heard, Judgment Day is pencilled in for 21 May and [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,73,11],"tags":[360,441,72,932],"class_list":["post-9391","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-media","category-randomness","category-religion","tag-christianity","tag-marketsineverything","tag-pets","tag-thecrazyyears"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2hpV6-2rt","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9391","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9391"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9391\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22275,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9391\/revisions\/22275"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9391"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9391"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9391"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}