{"id":37095,"date":"2017-02-01T02:00:44","date_gmt":"2017-02-01T07:00:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/?p=37095"},"modified":"2017-01-30T15:59:20","modified_gmt":"2017-01-30T20:59:20","slug":"ace-and-the-shitty-tools-of-despair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/2017\/02\/01\/ace-and-the-shitty-tools-of-despair\/","title":{"rendered":"Ace and the shitty tools of despair"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ace put up some shelves recently. He was not impressed<\/a> with some of the tools he used:<\/p>\n

I thought I had a drill that could drill (and drive screws) through studs. I did not. What I had was two pieces of shit which, combined together, made up a collection of shit that took up more space in my tool drawer than a single piece of shit would.<\/p>\n

The things could not even push past the first eighth inch of drywall. The easiest part.<\/p>\n

It’s like, “Hey, thanks Tool. Thanks for getting me past that first easy eighth inch. I’ll take it the rest of the way, now that you’ve gotten me off to such a swell start. You take a well-earned break, and get back to napping in that drawer. I’ll power through the rest of this with my forearms and my dinky little ratchet.”<\/p>\n

I literally was just pushing on the drill to make a small starter hole for the screw, like it was a poorly-balanced nail with a pistol grip.<\/p>\n

It’s a poor workman who blames his tools, but I think you can all agree I am<\/em> a poor workman in the first place, and these really are shitty, shitty tools.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ace put up some shelves recently. He was not impressed with some of the tools he used: I thought I had a drill that could drill (and drive screws) through studs. I did not. What I had was two pieces of shit which, combined together, made up a collection of shit that took up more […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":35193,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[57,15,487,161],"tags":[156],"class_list":["post-37095","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humour","category-technology","category-tools","category-woodworking","tag-fail"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/06\/favicon.png","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2hpV6-9Ej","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37095","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37095"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37095\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":37097,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37095\/revisions\/37097"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/35193"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37095"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37095"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/quotulatiousness.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37095"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}